thursday

It's Thursday. My favorite day. 

I made it.

Maybe just barely, but I made it. 

It's been a bit of a bleak week, but...

In the midst of hate, I found there was, within me, an invincible love.

In the midst of tears, I found there was, within me, an invincible smile.

In the midst of chaos, I found there was, within me, an invincible calm.

I realized, through it all, that…

In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer.

And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger – something better, pushing right back.

Albert Camus

roses in december

J.M. Barrie said, "God gave us memory so that we might have roses in December."

Memory. Memories. Today I am ever so thankful for my memory, and memories in general. I read that memory is the capacity for retaining and reviving facts, events, impressions, etc. I love that! Through memory we can not only retain, we can revive our feelings, impressions, joys, laughs, loves.... 

Of course, this is not always a fun thing. Sometimes it's super painful and all we want is to be able to forget. But, you know what? I will totally accept all that kind of pain and capacity to revive the bad when it means I can bring back to life all the good. 

I never want to not remember. There is far too much love and beauty and heart-bursting happiness that I never want to lose.

Kevin Arnold on the Wonder Years once said, "Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things, you are, the things you never want to lose. It's so true.

Today, I ran across a few photos from a family vacation a couple of years ago. It was only 10 photos, 10 out of hundreds, probably even thousands, I took that week. In this tiny representation, people were missing, as were so many of the things we did that week. But, still, those 10 photos brought it all back. I revived, and relived, the whole, magical week. The feelings, the laughter, the smiles, the sounds, the smells...all of it.

And, today, I'm thankful for that. The magic of memories.

So, here they are, little pieces of the things I love, the things I am, the things I never want to lose....

Memories

Light the corners of my mind.

Misty water-colored memories of the way we were.

Scattered pictures of the smiles we left behind,

Smiles we gave to one another, for the way we were.

So, it's the laughter we will remember.

Whenever we remember

The way we were.

The way we were.

Memories.

a quick trip to the hundred acre wood

I just recently re-read this lovely little classic and thought I'd share a few little gems I particularly enjoyed...

Some have brains, and some haven't, he says, and there it is.

I do remember, and then when I try to remember, I forget.

Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.

It is hard to be brave...when you're only a Very Small Animal.

A little consideration, a little thought for others, makes all the difference.

They don't think - that's what's the matter with some of these others. They've no imagination.

...and really, it wasn't much good having anything exciting like floods, if you couldn't share them with somebody.

It's so much more friendly with two.

Such a sweet, cozy little read...just what I needed this week. So simple. So much to think about.

And, finally, one of my favorites...

"When you wake up in the morning, Pooh...what's the first thing you say to yourself?" "'What's for breakfast?'...What do you say, Piglet?" "I say, 'I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?'" Pooh nodded thoughtfully. "It's the same thing." he said.

I love Pooh Bear.

a moment in the shadows

Because I need a little magic in my life today.

I had such great hopes for today. I was excited and quite positive about the start of a new month. February was going to be a new beginning.

But then life said, "Not so fast, Pollyanna!"

I feel like life says this to me a lot. You'd think I'd learn. But, I refuse.

Walt Disney once said,

Life is composed of lights and shadows, and we would be untruthful, insincere, and saccharine if we tried to pretend there were no shadows. Most things are good, and they are the strongest things; but there are evil things too, and you are not doing a child a favor by trying to shield him from reality. The important thing is to teach a child that good can always triumph over evil.

I love Walt Disney. And I love that quote.

I generally try to ignore the shadows of life. Or at least I try to not let anyone see that sometimes they get to me. I never want to be negative or to let anyone know that my life can be anything but sunshine and rainbows and magic and pixie dust. I am genuinely quite happy and I truly believe that if you keep your face to the sun, the shadows fall behind. I really believe that light will always chase the dark away.

But, the thing is, there are days when the sun isn't shining - no matter how much you look for it. There are days when there is nothing but shadows.

Despite my high hopes for it, today turned out to be one of those days. And all I want to do is run away. I don't want to be a grown up anymore. (Not that I ever did...but some days are better than others.) Today, I am in the shadows. And it's very real.

But, the thing is...even when I am here, in the shadows, I know it won't last. I know the light will come. Sooner or later, it always does and it always will.

So, even though I can't - and shouldn't - pretend that there are no shadows, I can say, with confidence, that the light will come. The shadows will fall away.

Because the good things are truly the strongest things.

Yes, "...even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise." It's true. I know it.

That being said, I'm giving up on today.

If anyone needs me, I'll be curled up in bed, waiting for this particular shadow to pass.

At least until tomorrow morning.